If you’re having a hard time listening or understanding where another person is coming from, here are some tips you can use, even when you’re at your at the end of your rope:
- First, take a deep breath. Approach the situation from a place of respect and care for yourself. You don’t want to get anymore upset, so take care of yourself by becoming calm first.
- Next, place yourself in the other person’s shoes: What are they thinking? Why? Why would they act that way? How do they feel? Etc. The more you can try to get yourself out of your head and into theirs, the better.
- Try repeating their feelings back to them, and ask, “Did I get that right?” or “Is that what you’re saying?” Paraphrase what they are saying to you to show them that you are trying to understand.
- Finally, just because you understand something doesn't mean you have to agree with it. If you do disagree, you can do so calmly and from a place of understanding.
Stephanie Mansour, CEO of Step It Up with Steph, is a Health & Fitness Expert and Body Image & Confidence Coach. As a certified personal trainer, yoga instructor, Pilates instructor, and life coach, Stephanie has been featured on CNN, AOL, and more for her realistic and holistic approach to health & fitness. She coaches women through her virtual 30 Day Jumpstart Program, and recently trained her client to lose 83 lbs in 12 weeks on NBC Chicago!